Slow Sex & Tantric Sex Explained

Watch the video above to learn more about the principles outlined below, defining slow sex and tantric sex:

Teachers

I believe it is so important to give credit where credit is due and acknowledge the many teachers whose works have influenced my own, whose research and lived experiences have contributed to my own breakthroughs and insights, which I now get to share with you. 

If you are someone who learns best by supplementing your experiential practice with mental or intellectual understanding, then I recommend browsing the Resources list below and picking a book or two to read while you work your way through MELT. 

But be honest with yourself - don't get one of those books if you're going to use reading to procrastinate or avoid the actual practices!  You cannot "intellectualize" your way into an embodied experience. You've got to practice it.

Slow Sex

The book Slow Sex by Diana Richardson has been my primary source of information on the topic. Layla Martin also emphasizes slowness as a key principle of holistic sex, and encourages the practice of slow self-pleasure as a way to increase sensitivity. 

Tantra / Tantric Sex 

On the topic of tantra and tantric sex, my primary teacher has been Layla Martin, who founded the Tantric Institute of Integrated Sexuality, where I received my certifications as a Sex, Love, and Relationship Coach, a Female Sexuality Coach, and a Tantric Sex Coach. 

Layla has studied many different tantric traditions - both classical and neo-tantra - and her training teaches students how to apply classical tantric tradition to sexual embodiment practices that are "neo."  

I have also taken the Foundations of Tantrik Yoga online course from Hareesh (Christopher Wallis), and I've read his book Tantra Illuminated. 

Diana Richardson has written extensively about tantric sex as well as slow sex, and these books from her have been another strong influence: 

  • The Heart of Tantric Sex by Diana Richardson
  • Tantric Orgasm for Women by Diana Richardson
  • Tantric Sex for Men by Diana Richardson and Michael Richardson

Urban Tantra by Barbara Carrellas has been another great resource.

Sacred Sex

There's a third category of teachers and influences that are not guided by principles of slow or tantric sex in particular, but still aim to bring experiences of higher consciousness, personal evolution, and divine awakening to sexual intimacy.  I consider these to be "sacred sex" teachers.

Here are some sacred sex resources I've been exploring: 

  • Playing with Fire  by Justin Pierce and Londin Winters
  • A Return to Eros by Marc Gafni and Kristina Kincaid
  • Finding God through Sex by David Deidas

Resources

Playing with Fire: The spiritual path of intimate relationship

A Return to Eros: The radical experience of being fully alive

Finding God Through Sex: Awakening the One of Spirit Through the Two of Flesh

Tantric Orgasm for Women

Slow Sex: The path to fulfilling & sustainable sexuality

The Heart of Tantric Sex

Tantric Orgasm for Women

Tantric Sex for Men: Making love a meditation

Urban Tantra: Sacred Sex for the 21st Century

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